THE IMPORTANCE OF FEELINGS AND BEING IN THE NEW WORLD by Buffy B.

Yesterday, I had dinner at an Indian restaurant with a dear friend and wonderful healer. As we sat opposite each other, I could feel her tender heart melting through her eyes. I told her a couple of challenging personal stories, where I shared my vulnerable self and a myriad of feelings and emotions. My friend's response was to add suggestions and subtly offer suggestions to fix the situation. I didn't fully realize it at the time, but I would rather have had her move into a deeper listening place, and just BE from her warm heart with my sharing. I noticed that about half way through our dinner, I began to feel subtly shutdown, and noticed we weren't feeling as close or connected in our hearts. 

The next day my friend emailed me, apologizing for anything she had done wrong, as she too had felt the disconnect. I wrote back, excusing myself for being completely honest, and said: 

"I hope I can be totally honest with you. There have been moments when I am with you, that I notice you offering to fix me, to present solutions to what I share. Instead of this, I would rather that you go into your deepest "listening" place, and just BE.....with the notion of purely Being with my sharing, with nothing to do......no rescue mission necessary. The gift I am asking for is to just be completely heard." 

As I drove home that night, I realized that I had not paid attention to the subtle "off-feelings" I felt during dinner. I also realized that I had not communicated that I was simple wanting to be heard, not to be fixed.

Letter from The Guidance: (guidance is my inner angelic voice that is always speaking to me and guiding me.....as it does for all of us, all of the time).......

"My dear One, you have learned 2 things: the first is to pay extra attention to moments when you feel slightly off, or slightly out of alignment. Your feelings are a kind of guidance system, made to speak to you, so you can learn and make other and wiser choices......as in this case when you were feeling uncomfortable about being "fixed" rather than being deeply heard by the heart. Had you listened to the prompting of uncomfortable feelings, you could have said something, you would have stayed connected, and not disconnect with your friend. The second lesson, is that honesty is the best policy....speaking your mind and your truth will only get you the gold. We suggest you slow down, become more aware of your feeling guidance, so you can chose from a mindful place."

Gregg Braden tells of an experiment that hints at the nature of reality. In this experiment, human DNA was placed in 28 vials. One vial was given to each of 28 researchers. Each researcher had been trained in how to generate and experience deep feelings and each had strong emotions.

The experiment revealed that the DNA changed according to the feelings of the researchers. When the researchers experienced gratitude, love and appreciation, the DNA responded by relaxing. The strands unwound and the length of the DNA increased.

When the researchers felt anger, fear, frustration, or stress, the DNA responded by constricting. It shortened and many of its codes were switched off! If you've ever felt shut down emotionally by negative emotions, now you know why your body was equally shut down. When the researchers felt love, joy and appreciation, the constriction was reversed and the codes were switched back on.

This experiment was later followed up by testing HIV-positive patients. In these patients, feelings of love and gratitude generated 300,000 times the immune response than without those feelings. Apparently, one’s emotional state weighs in mightily when it comes to resistance. 

20 affirmations for a happy summer by Louise Hay

20 Affirmations for a Happy Summer

by Louise Hay

Summer has begun and with it some people worry too much about how they are going to look in that bathing suit. Whether you are overweight or just stressing about how you look, it’s time to stop the self-criticism.

It’s important to realize that all of our actions are designed to meet a need. Oftentimes, being overweight is caused by insecurity, self-rejection, and fear of our own feelings, while overeating is usually an attempt to love and nurture ourselves with food.

The original problem may very well stem from childhood beliefs and choices. Once seen and addressed, these outdated beliefs can be released for new ones that serve us now as complete and perfect adults. Filling our minds with pleasant thoughts is the quickest road to health.

Start today by saying these affirmations and posting them somewhere in your home:

I love my body exactly as it is. 

I am my perfect weight. 

I am my perfect size. 

I eat only when I am truly hungry. 

I am drawn only to foods that truly nourish my body. 

I eat slowly. 

I savor every bite. 

I love to eat healthy foods. 

I release the fear of food. 

I drink lots of water and herbal teas. 

Food flows through my body with ease. 

Every morsel I eat rejuvenates my cells. 

All the food I eat energizes me. 

I breathe deeply as I eat and digest. 

I love to exercise. 

I love walking briskly. 

I have respect and a high regard for myself. 

I balance my life around work, rest, and play. 

I support, love, and accept myself unconditionally. 

I am happy and peaceful beyond my wildest dreams.

Enjoy the summer!

A NEW LOOK AT POSITIVE THINKING By Alan Handelsman

 

 Your Attitude has a LOT to do with how your dowsing turns out.  First rule:  be objective.  What’s that?   Well being objective is not being attached to the outcome or the answers your system gives you.  Ed Stillman (Master Dowser, Teacher) always says to ask “I wonder what the answer will be?” Here Alan Handelsman shares how being positive can lead to curiosity and confidence in dowsing. Alan Handelsman, dowser, hypnotherapist and musician will be the keynote speaker at the 2014 West Coast Dowsers Conference, (Friday July 4).   A New Look at Positive Thinking, by Alan Handelsman Imagine a coach in the locker room with his (I know I could use female pronouns, but even in my imagination, it was easier to gain access to the men’s locker room. I encourage you to access whichever works best for you.) team, just before the championship game. Coach #1 says, “Men, winning is hard, and you have to give 110% out there. And if you do that, and you don’t make any mistakes, I know you can win this thing!”
 Coach #2 says, “Men, today one team will win the championship. In fact, one of only two teams has to win it! Let’s go out there and see if that team is US!  Which coach is more positive? Which would you rather play for?   Now imagine that you are starting a new job or activity, and you have some fears and doubts. Friend #1 says, “Fear is a negative emotion. You shouldn’t be afraid. Dowse the fear and clear it, and then you will be fine!”
 Friend #2 says, “I know that starting a new job has unknowns that can be very scary. Of course you have some fears and doubts. Please call me, because I’m really interested in how your first day goes.” Which friend understands you better? Which friend is more positive?
Much of what passes for positive thinking is simply judging thoughts and emotions (and energies, but I will concentrate more on the first two) to be good or bad, and trying to eliminate the bad. So positive thinkers spend roughly half of their time fighting the negative, and feeling wrong or inadequate if they don’t win that fight. However, I believe that most of our problems with how we think and feel started with trying to fight our own thoughts and feelings. As children, we were told not to feel sad, afraid, or (especially) angry. But we were also taught not to feel joy. (“What’s all the noise in here, keep it down!” Or, “Those are good grades, let’s see if you can keep them up next term.”)  Notice that a lot of what passes for positive thinking puts more pressure on a person, starts from a position of wrong and inadequate, and often doesn’t achieve the desired result. My definition of being positive is saying, “Yes.” Using this new definition, if we are afraid, instead of telling ourselves that we shouldn’t feel that way, we can tell ourselves, “Yes! I feel afraid!” Now that we own it, we can change how we experience any emotion. And we can put any emotion to positive use. (There’s that word again!)If we say yes to our thoughts and emotions – not as truth necessarily, but simply as what we are thinking or feeling – then we are already being positive, and it leads to two things. Curiosity and confidence.   To me, curiosity is a much better motivator that the old positive thinking.   Imagine going into an activity. You can tell yourself one of two things.“I know I can do this.” If a part of you doesn’t really know this, or has doubts, then you may have the vague sense of lying to yourself, which creates greater stress and more doubts. Or you can say, “I’m looking forward to this. I’ve done my work and preparation, and I wonder what my experience will be like.”Which feels more positive to you? Which way allows you to be more confident?  Confidence doesn’t mean you are sure that you can do perfectly. True confidence means that you know you are capable, you are equal to the situation, and whatever the outcome, you will be able and capable. To be confident, you don’t have to be perfect, (which you’ve never been), but simply able to handle a situation, which you’ve already been doing. So maybe that means that confidence isn’t something you need to achieve, but something you already possess that you can recognize, express, and use more and more to your advantage.Yes, true confidence starts with thinking a positive thought. “Yes, this is how I feel right now.”What does all this have to do with dowsing? A lot. It may change the types of questions you ask your dowsing system. For instance, instead of “How can I clear this?” you may ask, “How can I use this?” Instead of,  “How can I achieve more?” you may ask, “How can I more easily enjoy the person I am?”
 Think of sitting down to dowse. Now you may be asking yourself, “I wonder if I’m — good/relaxed/hydrated/special/ allowed/capable/experienced — enough to do this well.”
 What you are asking is something you may always be asking yourself.   “Am I enough?” Just for fun, do something different. As you sit to dowse, simply ask yourself, “I wonder what the answers will be?”  Be curious, and know that whatever the results are, you are enough.[AlanHpic2]

 

THE GOOD LIFE

What Is Positive Psychology, and What Is It Not?

Positive psychology studies what makes life most worth living.Published on May 16, 2008 by Christopher Peterson, Ph.D. in The Good Life

In less than a decade, positive psychology has caught the attention not only of the academic community but also the general public. I just did a google search for "positive psychology' and found 419,000+ hits. That is obviously impressive, although keeping all of us positive psychologists humble is that my searches for the "Olsen twins" and "Britney Spears" produced 6,390,000+ and 113,000,000+ hits, respectively.

It is still good that larger world is interested in positive psychology, and probably even better that this interest does not entail morbid curiosity and the wish to witness a train wreck.

Regardless, the downside of whatever popularity positive psychology enjoys is the temptation for those of us associated with this new field to run ahead of what we know in pursuit of further popularity. So let me slow down and explain what positive psychology actually is and what we actually know.

Positive psychology is the scientific study of what makes life most worth living. It is a call for psychological science and practice to be as concerned with strength as with weakness; as interested in building the best things in life as in repairing the worst; and as concerned with making the lives of normal people fulfilling as with healing pathology.

Nowhere does this definition say or imply that psychology should ignore or dismiss the very real problems that people experience. Nowhere does it say or imply that the rest of psychology needs to be discarded or replaced. The value of positive psychology is to complement and extend the problem-focused psychology that has been dominant for many decades.

Several truisms underpin positive psychology. First, what is good in life is as genuine as what is bad--not derivative, secondary, epiphenomenal, illusory, or otherwise suspect. Second, what is good in life is not simply the absence of what is problematic. We all know the difference between not being depressed and bounding out of bed in the morning with enthusiasm for the day ahead. And third, the good life requires its own explanation, not simply a theory of disorder stood sideways or flipped on its head.

Positive psychology is psychology--psychology is science--and science require checking theories against evidence. Accordingly, positive psychology is not to be confused with untested self-help, footless affirmation, or secular religion-no matter how good these may make us feel. Positive psychology is neither a recycled version of the power of positive thinking nor a sequel to the secret.

Positive psychology will rise or fall on the science on which it is based. So far, the science is impressive. Consider what has been learned in recent years about the psychological good life, none of which was mentioned in any of the psychology courses I took a few decades ago:

• Most people are happy.
• Happiness is a cause of good things in life and not simply along for the happy ride. People who are satisfied with life eventually have even more reason to be satisfied, because happiness leads to desirable outcomes at school and work, to fulfilling social relationships, and even to good health and long life.
• Most people are resilient.
• Happiness, strengths of character, and good social relationships are buffers against the damaging effects of disappointments and setbacks.
• Crisis reveals character.
• Other people matter mightily if we want to understand what makes like most worth living.
• Religion matters.
• And work matters as well if it engages the worker and provides meaning and purpose.
• Money makes an ever-diminishing contribution to well-being, but money can buy happiness if it is spent on other people.
• As a route to a satisfying life, eudaimonia trumps hedonism.
• The "heart" matters more than the "head." Schools explicitly teach critical thinking; they should also teach unconditional caring.
• Good days have common features: feeling autonomous, competent, and connected to others.
• The good life can be taught.

This latter point is especially important because it means that happiness is not simply the result of a fortunate spin of the genetic roulette wheel. There are things that people can do to lead better lives, although I hasten to say that all require that we live (behave) differently ... permanently. The good life is hard work, and there are no shortcuts to sustained happiness.

WE CAN CHANGE THE WORLD

We Can Change the World

by Louise L. Hay

The thoughts we think, the words we speak, the beliefs we accept, shape our tomorrows. What will tomorrow be for you? 

If each one of us who is reading this article would practice getting in touch with the treasures within us on a daily basis, we could literally change the world. People living the truth change the world. For the truth of our being is that we are filled with unconditional love. We are filled with incredible joy. We are filled with serene peace. We are connected to infinite wisdom. 

What we need to do is to know it and live it! 

Today we are mentally preparing for tomorrow. The thoughts we think, the words we speak, the beliefs we accept, shape our tomorrows. Every morning, stand in front of a mirror and affirm to yourself:

I am filled with unconditional love, and I express it today.

I am filled with joy, and I express it today.

I am filled with peace, and I express it today.

I am filled with infinite wisdom, and I practice it today. 

And this is the truth about me. 

Now that is a powerful way to start your day! You can do it! 

Remember, our spiritual connection does not need a middle man. We can pray and meditate quite easily by ourselves. It is important that we know that we all have a direct pipeline to the source of all of life. When we are consciously connected to this source, our life flows in wondrous ways.

Our souls are always seeking greater growth and integration, an opportunity to heal and express all that we are. Sometimes it is very difficult to understand the methods our souls use to promote our growth. Our personalities, the part of us we assume in order to participate on the Earth plane, have certain expectations and needs. We become afraid, resistant, and sometimes angry when our expectations, such as material advancements, aren’t immediately met. 

It is in these moments, more than any other, that we must hold fast to our faith that there is a higher power working in our lives and that if we are open and willing to grow and change, that things will work out for our highest good. 

Often our most painful moments, the times that stretch our personality the furthest, are the moments that provide us with the greatest opportunity for growth. These become an occasion for you to develop great self-love and greater self-trust. It may or may not comfort you to know that many people are seemingly experiencing setbacks in their lives as well. 

We are at a place of accelerated growth on this planet. Now more than ever is the time to be extra loving and patient with yourself. Do not resist any opportunity for growth. In times of difficulty, it is important to practice gratitude and blessings as much as you are able.

Life is a learning process. We are here to learn and to grow. 

Let’s affirm:

 I make room for all the good that is waiting for me today.

THE AWAKENED HEART SYSTEM

THE AWAKENED HEART approach is part of the “New medicine” “new psychology”  movement. It is a holistic approach, that examines the whole person, body, mind, spirit. It is about enrichment of the spiritual or inner life, empowerment, fulfillment, balance, with emphasis on training the mind to support the well being of the spirit and quality of life. Although it works deeply with the shadow aspects of the individual, it is not merely a system that resolves issues. It views the shadow self as an opportunity for growth and development.

Dr. Martin Seligman, professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania, founder of the Positive Psychology movement, and past president of the American Psychological Assoc, says: “positive psychology seeks to make normal life more fulfilling, rather than merely treating mental illness.” This approach is primarily concerned with using the psychological theory, research and intervention techniques to understand the positive, adaptive, creative and emotional fulfilling aspects of human behavior.

This is a therapeutic model based on the “new medicine”: of spirituality, heart-mind connection, shadow work, truth, wellness, growth, empowerment, self awareness, relaxation, imagery, body mind practices. In this work, the whole system of life is considered to be spiritual and sacred. The whole person, body, mind and spirit is examined, not just mental functions and behaviors. Psychotherapy and spirituality are considered to be two parts of the whole.

This work includes the whole spectrum of spirituality, including:  contemplative-bodymind, heart-mind practices, self inquiry, universal truths, training the mind and awakening the heart, religion and spiritual/truth paths. It addresses the entry level and seasoned person on a quest for resolving issues and seeking truth. The energetic power of higher truth, love, childlike openness, God/Spirit is what is active in this process, which enables profound healing to take place. I am clearly not the expert, but merely a conduit for the higher heart mind.

I see people with issues for depression, anxiety, addictions, trauma, relationship, the woman’s pregnancy journey, spiritual transformation, life coaching, and general life chaos and brokenness. This process of integrating spirituality into psychotherapy has been highly successful with clients addressing issues of relationship, stress, depression, anxiety, addictions, abuse, trauma, some physical 

This earth is seen as a schoolroom for growth and evolution. The goal on earth is to learn to live and align with higher truths/God/all that is good. The psycho-spiritual journey is the path of inner inquiry, shadow exploration in which one’s issues are examined, one’s true essence and higher self is revealed, and a personal co-creative relationship with spirit/higher power is developed. The client’s limiting psychology, or shadow or false self is examined in order to facilitate access to the powerhouse of the truth that lies within, or spirit, or higher self.

The goal of this work is to assist others in examining the whole person, to awaken and return to the essential self, wherein lies the opportunity for healing brokenness, for transcendence, peace, joy, love, fulfillment, taking personal responsibility. One of the outcomes of this approach is that it turns ordinary life into one of fulfillment, empowerment, inspiration and growth. 

Every one of my clients, without exception, is in a spiritual crisis, and is grappling with the same underlying issue: a disconnect from the essential or higher self and from the spirit that moves through all things/God. To access an enhanced life of healing and transformation, one must begin an inner spiritual quest of self enrichment and self inquiry, which combines both psychology and spirituality.